I know that you are into me, especially since you're a virgin loser. I can see how you can fall head over heels for me. I have an idea that I think you will enjoy this. You try to flirt with me, try to go out with me, but I kept turning you down, but this proposal will be like having a charity case.
I will allow you to tell people that I am your girlfriend, I won't deny it, but I will never fuck you. I will hold your hand and maybe kiss your cheek when we are in public. But what do I get out of it?